Since I was really young, I had to hear this question from my father:
My usual answer was to get angry and to stop talking to him, but my thought was that I had to change that because it causes a really bad impression.
In September 2005, I was selected as participant in a BEST Trainshop: bePROUD 2005 that took place in Kiten (Bulgaria). In that event, besides a lot of other things, they told me something that my father was telling me since a lot of time before:
Since then I started to think on looking to the others' eyes when I was talking to them, I tried it at home, looking at presenters eyes in the TV,... It was hard at the beginning cause it was tiring, difficult to do and even not comfortable. I started keeping the eye contact just with really close friends and gradually I expanded that behavior to the rest of the people until it became something automatic, not forced anymore. I noticed that, some time after internalizing it.
"Why aren't you looking to my eyes when you talk to me?"
My usual answer was to get angry and to stop talking to him, but my thought was that I had to change that because it causes a really bad impression.
In September 2005, I was selected as participant in a BEST Trainshop: bePROUD 2005 that took place in Kiten (Bulgaria). In that event, besides a lot of other things, they told me something that my father was telling me since a lot of time before:
"Eye contact is really important to be perceived as a trustworthy person"
Since then I started to think on looking to the others' eyes when I was talking to them, I tried it at home, looking at presenters eyes in the TV,... It was hard at the beginning cause it was tiring, difficult to do and even not comfortable. I started keeping the eye contact just with really close friends and gradually I expanded that behavior to the rest of the people until it became something automatic, not forced anymore. I noticed that, some time after internalizing it.
Now, two years after doing that big effort, it's easier for me to talk to people, to lead projects, to speak in front of an audience, ...
This little gesture: to focus on the other instead of on the environment when you are talking to somebody can change a lot your relationships, the way the people see you and even the future of your career.
If you need some theoretical tips on how to achieve this goal, this website may be useful.
This little gesture: to focus on the other instead of on the environment when you are talking to somebody can change a lot your relationships, the way the people see you and even the future of your career.
It's an effort worth to do.
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